Tuesday, November 23, 2010

Smile like you mean it

I did it! I finally up and got myself blogging with a new site, new name, and a new little image that can stay at the time for the meantime.

Come join me at my new locale, smile in motion Hope to see you there!


Monday, November 15, 2010

Always searching

I totally pulled a number on myself.

So I was reading this article on Eat Pray Love which was a major critique about the book. About how she was just a privileged white lady searching for enlightenment with lots of cash and time at her leisure. Now, I definitely agree with this critique...even though I don't want to because I loved that book. Because I love the idea of taking a year to travel and go to magic places and 'find myself' and blah blah. And reading that critique made me feel SO TYPICAL. And who wants to be typical, huh? Sure, we are all trying to fit in and be normal...but typical? yuk.

anyway... so after that critique I was all "but how to I find enlightenment without well to do women telling me of their amazing exploits? and then following in their footsteps and buying my way to a higher level of being?" and then I decided that to be the MOST enlightened, I would actively NOT seek enlightenment.

genius! Enlightenment is right here waiting for me on my couch!

Now, as stupid as that does sound, I believe a part of it. Because I am always, always searching for something better. I'm always searching for more and striving for the best. But if you are always striving for the best, chances are you may pass up good along the way.

The best path probably lies in the in between world of moderation. Enlightenment/happy/content does take work.....but maybe not to the level being pushed by what may evolve into an Enlightenment Industrial Complex. We may not need retreats and trips...just giving ourselves some more attention. The never ending quest for that better place has got to stop and I have to just take a look around and enjoy where I'm at.

Thursday, November 4, 2010


Why hello there! Yes, I do still exist. And no, I haven't totally abandoned the blog! (even though it totally looked like it for a while)

I just needed to take a break. A BIG break. From thinking about the wedding. And the wedding was too emotionally fraught for me to really talk about it or do too many recaps about deep things. In all honesty, I'm not ready to share all I think about the wedding. Partially because I'm still working on what I think but mostly because I know some of what I think and I'm still dealing with it.

Because the wedding was great and I'm glad we did it. But it was not the best day of my life. And that is hard to come to terms with.

I do get giant fuzzies in my tummy though when I think about standing up there during the ceremony with my darlin. And sometimes, when we are just hanging out, Brett will get this big, silly grin on his face and he'll say, "You looked so beautiful that day."

And honestly - that makes it all worth it. To hear those words here and there, scattered through my future will make it all worth it.

Oh, and I kinda do plan on letting this blog slowly fade. But I wanna start a new, non wedding focused blog. Wanna know the only thing holding that up? I can't come up with a freakin NAME! I know right. Silly! So I'm waiting for inspiration to come to me on that but also enjoying a break from blog land. There were some things I neglected while immersed in blog land... :)

But its been about a month and I thought I'd throw a line out there and let you know I haven't (totally) abandoned blog land...hopefully you haven't abandoned me!