So far, most everyone around me is pushing for a traditional wedding - parents, in-laws, awesome-and-helpful aunties, the big, bad society, and so on. But the vibe just changed.
One of my best ladies, lady of honor, sister-from-another mister, just got back in town. She was off living the ski bum dream but is back for the non-ski season! Its great to have her back in town and I can't wait to have her help for the wedding. We totally vibe together and I don't think I would ever hear her say anything along the lines of "Well, traditionally people do this..." or "You should do this - thats the way its normally done!" Such a relief not to have another person pressuring me to do dumb crap that costs way to much! :)
At the same time, this wedding is well underway and has been swayed by the traditional wedding forces. Its hard to avoid when all I have is people telling me to do things one, traditional, big, white, expensive, crazy way! I like to think that I've done a good job holding my ground and making our wedding what we want it to be...
But then I enter the What If zone. What if Ski Bum Bridesmaid had been here helping steer me away from crazy? Would our wedding look different? Is our wedding too big and crazy already? EFF!
Ok, really, I'm fine. No worries. I just feel pulled in two directions. The super hippie, chill, just let it flow direction and the traditional, heart attack, consumerized wedding direction. Hopefully I can fall into some sane middle ground where our wedding will look like us and feel like us and just be happy. Because that is my theme. When asked at our engagement announcement about colors/themes/whatever I just told them that our theme is going to be "Happy" and I'm sticking to that.
Ahhh... the 'what if' zone. I find myself in that zone CONSTANTLY. That and the 'shoudla-coulda-woulda' zone. Good thing we have good people around us to keep us mellow.
ReplyDeleteOh god, the 'what if' zone indeed. I just have to remember how the biggest thing I've been in the 'what if' zone for over the last couple of weeks (the photographer) actually was a high point of this week when the photographer we didn't choose but still loved was actually classy enough to leave a comment and even tweeted about my post which included, among other things, agonizing about only being able to choose one vendor of each type when we've been meeting some great people. Le sigh.
ReplyDeleteThis 'what if' zone is mostly self-imposed for me though, so far I actually really haven't gotten nearly as much pressure from Dan's family about doing things the 'traditional' way--one way that the traditional view that a wedding is all up the bride and not the groom is helping me, I suppose! It'll be interesting to see what happens when his sisters start getting hitched as well. I love my practical mom.
Hooray awesome friends :)