Tuesday, June 15, 2010

Defending your own

Yesterday I came home to see my mister on the phone. After a few seconds observing, I knew it was with his mother. I sat down to start putting our stamps on our invites (SQUEE!!) and heard this, "No, that's actually the opposite. Blogs have helped her deal with the wedding in a good way. Its the other mainstream sites and magazines that were driving her crazy!"

Apparently my mother in law thought I should stop reading blogs. She couldn't understand why I read them so much and thought they were bad for me.*

This made my defensive hairs stand up and I wanted to grab the phone and defend all you thoughtful ladies in the really amazing community and defend myself from such allegations... but I didn't have to.

The mister went on to describe (and very well, might I add) how there are so few good resources out there for brides. How the first wedding resources you find are insidious pooh heads that have no heart and no soul and just make brides feel bad about how ugly their wedding is going to be unless they include one of the latest "hot color combos" or have a "stylish theme"! Or how they have to put on a show to "wow your wedding guests"!**

Ok, he didn't get into that much detail, because I'm pretty sure hes actually never looked at The Knot or Martha Stewart Weddings or any other general WIC thing. But anyway.

In this conversation that I came home to yesterday, he defended me and my blogs. He also defended our so far limited inclusion of his family in the planning process AND he defended our choices for our guest list.*** Good job, baby!

I was so proud and so happy! First of all, he does an amazing job of moderating between his mother and I. I know he is on my team and prioritizes us as a couple and as a new forming family first. This is not the first time and probably won't be the last time that we have to deal with in-law issues, so its such an amazing relief that we are on the same page and can effectively deal with these issues. He naturally followed Lisa's advice from A Practical Wedding post that in dealing with in-laws,

The most important thing is that,

1. your partner is on your side.
2. your partner navigates.

When he got off the phone, I pounced him and attacked him with a million kisses and much praise for his wonderful dealings with his mom and not making me deal with it.

That's my story for the day.


*I will agree that at some point, even reading blogs gets to be too much. I've learned to limit what I read and to stay away from the ones that make me feel our wedding is inadequate in any way. I'm passed gathering 'inspiration' for the most part and just want to crank this thing out. The blogs now are serving as just a great social community to share with and connect to.
** Burn in hell, Knot! I hate you! ok...just a little venting...
*** Apparently his mama had a lot to get off her chest!


  1. Thats awesome. Way to go furture husband!

  2. This post makes me want to hug you and your fiance and all the other wedding bloggers out there!

  3. GOOD JOB.

    and yeah- even the GOOD wedding blogs can start to make you feel like your own wedding wasn't "meaningful" or "joyful" enough. ah, blogging.

  4. Yeah, great job groomie! There's nothing quite so satisfying as witnessing your betrothed standing up for you. I am consistently overwhelmed by the world of wedding blogs, and sometimes a new blog I discovered that seemed awesome initially later turns out to be a Knot clone and only shows weddings that cost over $50K. Blarg!

    As the groom, I have a bit of the opposite problem with my mom in re: blogs - she's obsessed with mine. Especially because I won't allow her to be my Facebook friend so she relishes in the details of my life. But I guess having your mom be your #1 fan is not the worst thing in the world :)

  5. I am fully on board with hitchdied! Good WORK mister man!

  6. Oh, that is so awesome.

    You've got a keeper there (not that you hadn't figured that out already)!

  7. Miss C is so right...he's a keeper. It must have been a wonderful feeling to hear your guy standing up for you, your blogs, and the decisions you've made together.