Thursday, July 1, 2010

What do with with a wedding decision gone wrong?

I was going to write a post on this today...and then I realized I shouldn't. I have a wedding decision gone wrong, but I am not sure yet what exactly I'm going to do about it! So instead of me saying blah blah thoughts blah blah ramble, this is more of an open discussion.

  • Have you made a decision for your wedding that you regret?
  • What (if anything) have you or are you going to do about it?
  • General advice?

Note: There are a ton of decisions that I fret over. But only one where I know I should have done something different and want to change it. Possibly more to come on this in the future.


  1. Crap, I posted a response and got an error msg. :P

    Okay, let's try again: I'm trying to think if I really regretted any wedding decisions. It's tough to say, because in those last few weeks, I pretty much questioned and fretted over every decision, even our oldest and most favorite (outdoors? no bridesmaids? why didn't we just go to city hall?!)

    But in the end (and yes, this is said with the nostalgia/blurriness of being 2 weeks post-wedding), I don't think I actually-for-real regretted anything (except maybe not getting to spend enough time with every guest, which was impossible w/100+ people).

    So... I would say, do you think you will regret this decision 1 year out? 5 years? 20?

    If yes, I would do everything in my power to "fix" it, whatever that means. If the answer's no, if it's just a wistful "coulda, shoulda, woulda" (thank you, SatC, LOL) regret, I'd try to let it go because it will prob. fade quickly once the wedding's over.

    But I'd love to hear/discuss this more, if you feel comfortable sharing (I noticed you tagged this "dress"...)

  2. there have been times I wish we'd eloped, people I feel bad about not inviting, little details I rushed through or skipped, big deals I made out of nothing

    biggest mistake I've made thus far? stressing myself out beyond belief and staying up worrying.

    my advice: less stress/more happiness & ice cream sundaes (wedding diets be damned!)

  3. haha yea... plenty.

    you already know about one. and i think we're both kind of in the same place on how to deal with it etc.

    p.s. i talked to her and we're okay, but not bfff's. and that's just the way i like it.

    my other decision was inviting the person i'm thinking of not inviting anymore. so of course, i talked to friends to get an idea of the larger picture b/c when i get upset, sometimes i fail to read the whole story and only the parts that tick me off. then i wrote a post, which got GREAT feedback. so many wonderful ideas and tips. seriously, that helped big time. no one knows this person except the homespundiva so everyone's advice was unbiased in that respect. and so i'm taking everyone's advice to heart and not doing a damn thing about it. the invite is there- if she says no, great. if she says she's coming, then i steer clear of her bullshit. i was with some friends last night and one of them happily re-volunteered to play bouncer and deal with this person for me if it came down to it.

    my general advice would be to gain different perspectives from someone who understands the situation in depth and someone who doesn't, weight out whether or not reversing this decision is worth it and if going through with it is worth it (i always judge this by asking if it's worth my time/money/energy), and talk to FH about it as openly and honestly as you can. with the one issue i was emailing you about, after our email exchange Josh and I had some very serious talks. And although we can change that decision, we know how to prevent it in the future.

    Best of luck and you have my email if you need it!

  4. Margaret, perceptive, dear! Yes the tag was not accidental. I'll post more soon when my brain settles. and i'm really mullin over the "will regret this decision 1 year out? 5 years? 20?" because that is golden advice!

    Lisa, yeah, I definitely over think and over stress! its helpful to remember that the problem I see probably isn't as big as I think it is!

    Angie, glad to hear things are getting better! my issues on that issue are also getting better! yay for resolution! (somewhat)